Monday, November 19, 2007

Benefits of having very large hands

(This is a blog that I copied off my myspace page. I wrote it originally on 10/17/2007)

At work today Jake pointed out that in an image we were using in one of our courses, there was a guy who had really big hands and small ears. This got me thinking of the benefits of having very large hands. If you have extremely large hands you can:

  1. Go by the nickname "Lard hands"

  2. Hold really large drinks

  3. Use your hands as paddles for kayaking or canoeing

  4. Swim the front crawl very fast

  5. Slap the crap out of someone

  6. Be an example of the old joke that if your hand is bigger than your face, you are retarded, have cancer, etc.

  7. Pretend that your hand size indicates the size (or lack thereof) or other bodyparts (such as feet).

  8. Shield yourself and your buddies from the hot summer sun (with only one hand)

  9. Play baseball without a glove

  10. Get a special dialing wand for phone use (no more fumbling because you hit 4 numbers with one finger)

  11. Show off your exceptionally large nostrils.

  12. Show off your sausage link fingers

  13. Poke both of someone's eyes out with your pinky

This isn't the picture we were looking at but it will help you visualize what I'm talking about.
Well, that is what we came up with on the spot. Feel free to comment with your own ideas and maybe I'll add them to the list.

No comments:

My tunes